Parthymon (parthymon) wrote,

Oh my fucking god, why do people have to be so fucking stupid

Ok, see. I was having a nice day; pleasant really. I'm at the cafe and we're really slow. I'm really hard up for money this week and need some tips in that bowl, but I figure that if we're going to be slow, we're going to be slow, and I should enjoy it. Read the interwebs and my book, enjoy a nice cup of coffee, etc.

So, why does my day have to be ruined by dumb cunts? In a mere 5 minutes or so, I went from pleasant to pissed. First, an obviously oblivious teenage girl comes in and doesn't know what she wants. "I've had a vanilla latte before, what's a caramel macchiato?" I then tell her that is it basically a vanilla latte with caramel, to which she replies that she'll have one.

Now, let me stop right here and ask you something. Say you're in a coffeeshop and you're the only one there. There's only one guy working there. When you order something, he goes to make it. In the process of making it, you hear this really loud, swishing/sucking noise. You've no doubt heard it before in other cafes and in movies and on tv. I think that if you are living in America in 2007, you should be able to recognize the sound of milk being steamed when you're in a cafe. What does steamed milk mean? Well, at the very least, it means milk is going to be hot. Hmm... hot milk.... And yet, what does this walking abortion-that-got-away say to me when I bring her drink to her? "Oh, I wanted that iced"

They always do this to me, these barely pubescent trophy-wife-consumers-in-training and it is always with that drink. And they always say "Opp, I meant iced. Can you just add ice to it?" in their utter ignorance. Yes, I could add ice to it. And where I hate you enough for you to drink a water-down concoction of crap, I value myself and my work more than that, so no, I have to make you an ICED latte now and pour this down the drain.

And of course, no tip. That is, after her credit card crashes my computer. But the icing on the cake wasn't until the customer that came right after her. A man in a chef's coat with a woman in tow. I chit-chat a bit and he says he works in a restaurant across town (I'd asked if he worked at Hickory Tavern or Sticky Fingers because we give them discounts. I've started this conversation by trying to save him money, keep that in mind).

2 coffee's, a muffin, and some cake. No problem, 10 seconds flat, here's your shit. Now, I'd have been fine if he didn't leave me a tip. I'm usually a bit surprised when waitresses and those that work at restaurants don't tip me as most of us believe in tip kharma, but what does this asshat do? On the credit slip, in the tip area, he puts "N/A".

N/A? N fucking A? Not Applicable? You fucking asshole.

It is one thing if you don't want to spare 50 fucking cents, but you just effectively told me that someone like me receiving a tip isn't even conceivable. That it doesn't apply to me. N/A is something you put in a form asking your wife's middle name when you've never been married. Not applicable? You know what's not fucking applicable? Your cheap, smug ass working in a restaurant. Fuck you, fuck your woman, get the fuck out of my store. I hope you get dysentery while your hemroids flair up.

Sorry, but I felt the need to vent. Anyone who's worked as a waiter, etc, I think would feel the same way. Most of the people I know take care of their own. And don't bring your ignorance anywhere with you. If you don't know what something is, ask me, I'll inform you. Cafe's and lattes aren't new inventions. And if you didn't know, coffee is hot. When you order something and it doesn't have 'Iced' in front of it, you'll probably get it hot. And stop going to starbucks. They are evil and are confusing you.
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